Meditation, Ego Games, Being Assertive
Mondo - question and response - from Bristol Zen Dojo
Not Progressive
Q: I’ve heard it said, in several places, that Zazen [seated Zen practice] is not meditation. Have you heard that? And what does it mean?
C: In the Fukanzazengi, Dogen says that Zazen is not sanzen. What that means is Zazen is not a stepped progressive meditation. Some people might say Zazen is not meditation as a shorthand for this; When we use the word meditation in the West, we use it in many, many different ways - guided visualisations for example. There’s often the idea of getting something out of meditation in the West, of achieving something. But in the Fukanzazengi, it clearly says Zazen is not sanzen - stepped, progressive meditation. It is not a system of meditation where you go systematically through sets of techniques, trying to achieve different levels at different stages, and then moving on to something else.
Some Zen teachers will not use the word meditation to translate Zen. My first teacher, Nancy Amphoux didn’t particularly like using the word meditation. My current teacher, Guy Mercier, on the other hand, does like using it. So different people have different ways of talking about it, Literally, the word Zen means Dhyana in Sanskrit. It’s translated. In Sanskrit, the word is Dhyana, then in China it becomes Chan, and Chan becomes Zen in Japanese. And Dhyana is really the word which would normally be translated as meditation in English, in a text. So for example, in the eight limbs of yoga, the seventh limb is Dhyana, which is Zen, and the final limb is Samadhi, which is the fruits of meditation. And so Dhyana means concentration and openness.
Bodhisattvas
Q: In some Buddhist texts they talk about the bodhisattvas, like Avalokitesvara or Kanjizai in Japanese, as being real people. But in other senses, that sound more like personifications of ideals. What’s your interpretation?
C: From a Zen point of view, as with the Buddha, we don’t think of them as divine beings, but see them as representations. It may well be that an individual in the community of Buddhist practitioners at the time was called this, and had this particular aspect to themselves as strong in their character. And as a result, mythical stories arose around them. For example, Jean Shogen Baby, my second teacher after Nancy: Avalokitesvara (Quan Yin, Kannon) was very important to him – the female form of the bodhisattva of compassion. I think this was because it provides some receptive and compassionate energy; Zen practitioners can sometimes become a bit too rigid. And so for him, Quan Yin represented something that offered a bit of softness and compassion to balance this tendency.
Ego Games in the Sangha
Q: I’m noticing I’m feeling some disillusionment, because you’ve mentioned before about ego games playing out in Sanghas and Buddhist communities. I guess that gives me a bit of disillusionment.
C: Why?
Q: I guess I feel it means they are not necessarily safe spaces, or that maybe unkind behaviour might be accepted?
C: That’s a good question! So everyone is human. We are all imperfect. We’re all stumbling on the path. If someone is here, as long as they’re not insincere, we accept them for who they are. That doesn’t mean that if they are doing things which are problematic, someone doesn’t act. The fact that ego games and suchlike get played, that’s just part of human life. It’s the job of the community and individuals within it to make sure that the games that are being played out don’t cause harm. There will always be discomfort. We don’t want things to be so safe that there’s no discomfort. Because the fact that life is uncomfortable is one of the four Buddhist truths. Life is uncomfortable. But that doesn’t mean that if something is problematic, we simply accept it. But we need to live with the reality of each individual as they are, and not expect them to suddenly change into something that they aren’t.
Having said that, if there is something that’s happening that is specifically causing you problems, or someone else problems, then do speak with people about it. You can speak with one of the elders, or someone in a different group if you feel unable to share it with one of us.
Action beyond the Ego
Q: Zen teaches you a sort of ‘surrender’ side. But is there a side where sometimes in life you have to assert yourself in some way? I’m assuming, maybe in the end, Zen does a full circle where even the assertion feels sort of effortless. Is that to some extent true?
C: Yes, to some extent. You say, ‘assert yourself’. What I would say is, you ‘assert’ but you don’t ‘assert yourself’, if that makes sense. The assertion does not come from just a place of ego. An action, which maybe is a forceful action, arises when it’s necessary from the person that it should arise from.
I’ve had the experience where I’ve been in a state of practice and have been uncharacteristically assertive. I behaved in a way I wouldn’t normally, but, in that situation, it came out as the right thing. This was when I was younger. These days I’m an older person, and I am more comfortable, but my ego in the past was afraid of asserting itself.
There are interesting stories, not only from Zen, but also from some of the Vedanta teachers, where a teacher will encourage a student who is very assertive to learn to be less assertive, and a student that is not very assertive to be more assertive.
So the answer is not the same for everyone, but the action should come from a place beyond the ego. And if the ego is saying, I’m scared to assert when I need to in this situation, the ego needs to learn to let go and assert. If the ego is saying I don’t like these people, I want to assert, the ego needs to let go and learn to not assert.
Q: When you say, ‘beyond ego’, is that not understandable through the mind?
C: It’s not able to be put into words. As you practice, you experience, at times, a sense that things are flowing. An assertion might come out from a sense that something is flowing through you, rather than coming from your head, your anger, whatever.
The assertion that comes out -it might well be asserting something that’s necessary for you; sticking up for yourself. But it’s not sticking up for yourself, just for yourself. It might be sticking up for yourself for the other people as well, that they need to learn a lesson, but that lesson isn’t just from your ego.
Q: Yeah, you can kind of tell when it’s just in your mind, sort of creating stories, as opposed to when it’s more natural.
C: Exactly. That’s exactly right. So, for example, feeling that you always need to defend your pride is coming from an ego. It’s being able to let go and accept that sometimes something comes your way and you can let it pass, is good. But on the other hand, feeling that you always need to let other people step on you is also an act of ego. The answer in the end is through practice.
Thank you, everyone, for your questions and presence.